drft

woke you on a weak end
broke my way in and healed a hand you didn't have
we never were
a key with no lock and nothing to hide
i am all here
far from you.

now only when i erupt
you are my ashen warning
but my fading betrays me
and i stay awake through another day

eviscerated this vice of mine
speaking to you to pass my time
you encouraged me to break my rhythm
so i stopped rhyming with you.
you were only a liquor love.

m e m o r y f o a m

how many times
i wish i said hello. i could have made a mark
stole the show.
but i just sank into my own below.
where the same person is in the same space,
where she never leaves and even though i can't even
remember her face. she's everyone.
how many times i wanted to just show you i was worthy
of a connection but all i did was just hold the phone.
she's approaching me, but i have this feeling like i can't
make my heart come up to speed. she walks right through me
and i don't know if she saw the seed. i just regret never having
sewn a thing.

lilac lives another day

not well-received, she walks away. angry, almost explosive, she lets out a shriek. it's everything to me, she weeps. everything to be believed. she nearly doesn't survive the encore, yet alone she stands, parasite-stricken, broken heart, shaking hands. she makes her demands. she becomes floral, adorned and ornamented by the passions of They, the comfort of They, the security of They. she waits there, among they, humming about her days with you, remembering but not recalling you, with your broken hand (which she couldn't give back). she gets home safe. she stays awake. she doesn't sleep, she just waits.

Binary

My crime of passion, you are me seeing red.

You are not the world, you are the axis on which it spins.

My every other word, you are the filaments between the fury.

You are not the supposition, you are everything that’s real.

My darling conviction, you are the heart of will.

Paint (my worst work in YEARS)

You are indescribable, yet
You are all I've ever known.
You are as simple as a smile.
You are a heart entire, of which I have two.
You are years beyond my reach, yet
You are here for me, in my unforgiving state.
You are the grapevine, threading yourself into my soul,
You are the grapes I pick to perfume my moments.
You are elevation, elation, everything that starts with e.
You are what makes me happy, and
You are something I may never have.

Call of the Void

heartProblems

when it beats so hard it hurts
your nerves begin to turn
against your will
you clear your throat and speak
a language with no words
for I Love You

silent sonnet

this is a silent sonnet for a moment that never came to pass
for a person i've never met, i love you, but i'm glad i never asked.
this is about a struggle i've never faced, a pain i need not embrace.
for a memory that doesn't exist, floating like a leaf that never fell
on a lake that never swelled. this is a story that need not come to an end.
this is everything i'm glad to be, this is for all of you i've kept away from me.
this is patience, patiently walking. forward, alongside you, to meet in some other season.
for a fruit that will ripen, from something slowly sprouting, from within two people
who may not have met yet, who may never meet again, who may meet some day,
who may stay away, who may remain, who may, who may, who may today.

the arms of comfort are binding you

Starchild

You're an egg waiting to hatch. Lit ablaze at the strike of my match, born again when I've taken you apart, shown you reality and given you a place to start. You are nothing new, you are the tears of a galaxy, you are everything inside of me. You are where I want to be.

the story of the city that lost you

Darling deserter

I know you said you'd never hurt us
But what you're doing feels like murder
Please don't ever sleep
'Cause you'll dream of a better life
And I just want to be be at your side
 for one more night